Clerihew
Brave Sir Winston Churchill
could with his iron will
fortifying the beaches of Dover
so no airplane above could hover
Free form
A lamp hanging from the ceiling
hanging heavy above the ground.
All the shrouds it is unveiling
but it never be able to burst a sound.
With a single stroke igniting the wire
and we shall see that without smoke
the lamp can give away an eternal fire
that will end only with an inverse stroke.
Limerick
He's lucky that Meg isn't telling,
despite all her dad's angry yelling.
That mark on her neck
was more than a peck,
and could cause abdominal swelling!
Your limerick was my favourite, even though for the rythm's sake I think you should write is not. However it was very funny. I also found "the lamp can give away an eternal fire" to be very nice and poetic.
SvaraRaderaJust as the previous comment, the limerick is my favorite also!
SvaraRaderaThe last two lines of the Clerihew, because of the way the words Dover and hover are pronounced they don't really ryhme.
Promising work! Your clerihew needs fixing (besides the Dover/hover dissonance already pointed out, change to fortify and above them), but as for your other two, allow me to paraphrase Sir Winston himself: long after we're both gone, creative writing teachers will still say this was your finest hour, Robert! =)
SvaraRaderaGood Job Robert, I have to a agree with the others- The limerick was best, funny but horrible! Like your free form as well, though i had to struggle with the pace a bit. And yeah, no point commenting on the clerihew since i figure you have all ready worked on that. :)
SvaraRadera